True Meaning of Strength
by SailorYue
Summary: Kuro finaly learns the true meaning of strength...but at what cost? lame summery.... SPOILERS!


in the middle of starting to write my cute fic, THIS came into my mind. and i usualy HATE these kinds of fics. I truely dislike deathfics, mostly because i hate the depressing thoughts in them, but lo and behold. an angst filled KuroFai fic. -sigh-

Disclaimer: Kurogane and Fai belong to CLAMP. i hope neither of them meet the unhappy ending thats foretold :-(

SPOILER WARNING: Post-120, Pre-Infinity.

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Kurogane and Fai were sparring. Syaoran and Sakura, with Mokona were out searching for the feather. there wasnt much for the two elder members to do BUT this. Kurogane had just knocked Fai's weapon out of his hand and pointed Souhi towards him.

"Looks like I win this match." Kurogane said with a slight smirk. Fai on the other hand said nothing. He kept his head down, his lenghty hair blocking the veiw of his face. Fai lifted Kurogane's sword point up and held it to his throat. He looked at Kurogane with a sad look in his eye. Kurogane looked directly in his eye, wary at what the mage could be thinking.

"What...?"

"Back then, you made a promise. I want..." Fai left he sentence hanging.

Kurogane looked away fofr a moment. Then he looked back at Fai, face hardened, eyes ablaze. "Is that what you really want?" he said darkly.

Fai smiled sadly. it was a /real/ smile. "Yes. It is." he whispered softly.

Kurogane hesitated a moment, looking at his sword tip held against Fai's throat. He didnt bother to try to pull the sword away, knowing that it wouldnt budge against Fai's strenghth. He looked back into Fai's eye, and said one word. "Fine"

"Thank you... Kuro-sama." Fai said softly, smiling sadly.

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After then, Kurogane seemed to have broke. He spent all of his time locked in his room. Syaoran and Sakura seemed unable to coax him out of it. They weren't mad at what he had done. Syaoran was there when Kurogane had actualy /made/ the promise. It wasnt until sometime later that night that Kurogane opened his door.

"Oi. Manjuu, come here." Kurogane's voice was a bit haggard. There were no signs of tears on his face, but he did seemed less gruff then he used to be.

"Yes, Kurogane?" Mokona asked softly. Kurogane locked his door again, not wanting to be interrupted by the kids.

"I want to talk to the Witch." he answered, sitting on his bed. Mokona hopped onto the bed next to him and opened communication to Yuuko.

"Ah. Mokona, Kurogane. Is there something I can do for you?"

"There is. I have a wish to ask you." Kurogane said simply.

"I see. Mokona, could you go to sleep now?" Yuuko asked the small creature.

Mokona looked up at Yuuko a moment and noded. "OK, Yuuko." Mokona then closed its eyes and leaned against Kurogane, leaving the connection open.

Kurogane looked up at the Dimension Witch inquisitly.

"Now we can speak privately. What is it i can do for you, Kurogane?" Yuuko asked, eyebrow piqued, but otherwise serious look on her face.

Kurogane held up a sealed envelope. "I want this delivered to Tomoyo-hime. And I don't want /you/ to look at it at all."

"I see. And there is no point in convinicing you otherwise, on your course of action?"

Kurogane looked down. "No. I've never been more sure on anything since i swore my loyalty to Tomoyo-hime. This probably breaks the vow that I made back then, but this is more important to me than anything, now." Kurogane looked back up at the image of Yuuko, the fire back in his eyes, only less so than what it used to be.

"I understand. I'll make sure Tomoyo-hime receives it, and I accept the payment I will receive. Good luck on your endeavour, Kurogane." Yuuko said solemly, holding her hand out. Kurogane held the envelope in front of the sleeping Mokona. It vanished, reapearing in Yuuko's hand.

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The next morning, Kurogane asked Syaoran to go for a walk with him.

"I want to walk till we reach the end of the Manjuu's magic." He said simply, heading out down the road. Syaoran walked quickly, meeting Kurogane's pace.

"What is it you wanted, Kurogane-san?"

"I wanted to ask you a few things. You've picked up on the training I did with the other kid, right? Do you have any other fighting skills?"

Syaoran was surprised. "Yes, I'm proficient with the sword fighting you tought my clone, plus the training I received before I was sealed away. I'm also skilled at some martial arts as well. Why do you want to know?"

It was a few minutes before Kurogane answered him. "Because. I want to make sure the princess and Manjuu are in good hands."

Syaoran stopped walking a moment. "Kurogane-san... are you leaving us?"

Kurogane didnt answer. He just kept walking. Syoaran caught up with him. Neither spoke for some time. The next time Syaoran spoke was to inform Kurogane where MOkona's magic ended.

"About 10 feet from here, MOkona's power ends." Syaoran said softly, not meeting Kurogane's gaze.

"So you can sense magic too then, huh. Good." Kurogane turned and looked at Syaoran. "Protect her well, kid. Your all she's got."

Syaoran met Kurogane's eyes with a look of fierce determination. "I will."

"Good. Now, go back to the house. Do /not/ follow me. Understood?"

"Yes".

Kurogane watched as Syaoran walked down the hill, back towards the house they were staying at. Then he continued in the direction they wre originally heading, up to the top of the cliff. He stood staring out at the veiw for several moments. He then unsheithed Souhi and held it out.

"Thank you. Fai." He whispered softly, a tear running down his cheek. "Chiryuu jinenbun," he then cried, sending a great blue-white dragon out into the sky. He closed his eyes and held out Souhi again.

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_Tomoyo-hime,_

_I think I understand your meaning of the words  
"true strength" now. It took me to lose something  
for me to realise it; which is why i wont be returning  
home. I understand that what I'm doing is probably  
cowardly, but what He had me do was also cowardly.  
I bid you and Souma my farewell._

_Your loyal Ninja_

_Kurogane._

The letter bought tears to Tomoyo's eyes.

"He didnt, did he? I mean...he /wouldn't/!!" Souma asked her, tears also in her eyes.

"I'm afraid he did Souma." Tomoyo said softly, staring at the letter for some time. "I'm very proud of him that he understood." 'Good-bye, Kurogane' she said, in a prayer for both Kurogane and Fai.

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"Chiryuu jinenbun" - "Earth Dragon Circular Battle Dance". its Kurogane's most powerful attack. he used it in Outo on that Oni that attacked Fai. When he used it it broke his (lame-o) katana. Thanks Suu for getting me the name.

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this wasnt as bad to write as i thought. i'm actually more giddy then i am depressed.

please R&R.


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